LOOMINGTON, Ill. - R. Craig Hogan, a
former university professor who heads an online school for business
writing here, received an anguished e-mail message recently from a
prospective student.
"i need help," said the message, which was devoid of punctuation.
"i am writing a essay on writing i work for this company and my boss
want me to help improve the workers writing skills can yall help me
with some information thank you".
Hundreds of inquiries from managers and executives seeking to
improve their own or their workers' writing pop into Dr. Hogan's
computer in-basket each month, he says, describing a number that has
surged as e-mail has replaced the phone for much workplace
communication. Millions of employees must write more frequently on
the job than previously. And many are making a hash of it.
"E-mail is a party to which English teachers have not been
invited," Dr. Hogan said. "It has companies tearing their hair
out."
A recent survey of 120 American corporations reached a similar
conclusion. The study, by the National Commission on Writing, a
panel established by the College Board, concluded that a third of
employees in the nation's blue-chip companies wrote poorly and that
businesses were spending as much as $3.1 billion annually on
remedial training.
The problem shows up not only in e-mail but also in reports and
other texts, the commission said.
"It's not that companies want to hire Tolstoy," said Susan
Traiman, a director at the Business Roundtable, an association of
leading chief executives whose corporations were surveyed in the
study. "But they need people who can write clearly, and many
employees and applicants fall short of that standard."
Millions of inscrutable e-mail messages are clogging corporate
computers by setting off requests for clarification, and many of the
requests, in turn, are also chaotically written, resulting in whole
cycles of confusion.
Here is one from a systems analyst to her supervisor at a
high-tech corporation based in Palo Alto, Calif.: "I updated the
Status report for the four discrepancies Lennie forward us via
e-mail (they in Barry file).. to make sure my logic was correct It
seems we provide Murray with incorrect information ... However after
verifying controls on JBL - JBL has the indicator as B ???? - I
wanted to make sure with the recent changes - I processed today -
before Murray make the changes again on the mainframe to 'C'."
The incoherence of that message persuaded the analyst's employers
that she needed remedial training.
"The more electronic and global we get, the less important the
spoken word has become, and in e-mail clarity is critical," said
Sean Phillips, recruitment director at another Silicon Valley
corporation, Applera,
a supplier of equipment for life science research, where most
employees have advanced degrees. "Considering how highly educated
our people are, many can't write clearly in their day-to-day work."
Some $2.9 billion of the $3.1 billion the National Commission on
Writing estimates that corporations spend each year on remedial
training goes to help current employees, with the rest spent on new
hires. The corporations surveyed were in the mining, construction,
manufacturing, transportation, finance, insurance, real estate and
service industries, but not in wholesale, retail, agriculture,
forestry or fishing, the commission said. Nor did the estimate
include spending by government agencies to improve the writing of
public servants.
An entire educational industry has developed to offer remedial
writing instruction to adults, with hundreds of public and private
universities, for-profit schools and freelance teachers offering
evening classes as well as workshops, video and online courses in
business and technical writing.
Kathy Keenan, a onetime legal proofreader who teaches business
writing at the University of California Extension, Santa Cruz, said
she sought to dissuade students from sending business messages in
the crude shorthand they learned to tap out on their pagers as
teenagers.
"hI KATHY i am sending u the assignmnet again," one student wrote
to her recently. "i had sent you the assignment earlier but i didnt
get a respond. If u get this assgnment could u please respond .
thanking u for ur cooperation."
Most of her students are midcareer professionals in high-tech
industries, Ms. Keenan said.
The Sharonview Federal Credit Union in Charlotte, N.C., asked
about 15 employees to take a remedial writing course. Angela Tate, a
mortgage processor, said the course eventually bolstered her
confidence in composing e-mail, which has replaced much work she
previously did by phone, but it was a daunting experience, since she
had been out of school for years. "It was a challenge all the way
through," Ms. Tate said.
Even C.E.O.'s need writing help, said Roger S. Peterson, a
freelance writer in Rocklin, Calif., who frequently coaches
executives. "Many of these guys write in inflated language that
desperately needs a laxative," Mr. Peterson said, and not a few are
defensive. "They're in denial, and who's going to argue with the
boss?"
But some realize their shortcomings and pay Mr. Peterson to help
them improve. Don Morrison, a onetime auditor at Deloitte &
Touche who has built a successful consulting business, is among
them.
"I was too wordy," Mr. Morrison said. "I liked long, convoluted
passages rather than simple four-word sentences. And I had a
predilection for underlining words and throwing in multiple
exclamation points. Finally Roger threatened to rip the exclamation
key off my keyboard."
Exclamation points were an issue when Linda Landis Andrews, who
teaches at the University of Illinois at Chicago, led a workshop in
May for midcareer executives at an automotive corporation based in
the Midwest. Their exasperated supervisor had insisted that the men
improve their writing.
"I get a memo from them and cannot figure out what they're trying
to say," the supervisor wrote Ms. Andrews.
When at her request the executives produced letters they had
written to a supplier who had failed to deliver parts on time, she
was horrified to see that tone-deaf writing had turned a minor
business snarl into a corporate confrontation moving toward
litigation.
"They had allowed a hostile tone to creep into the letters," she
said. "They didn't seem to understand that those letters were just
toxic."
"People think that throwing multiple exclamation points into a
business letter will make their point forcefully," Ms. Andrews said.
"I tell them they're allowed two exclamation points in their whole
life."
Not everyone agrees. Kaitlin Duck Sherwood of San Francisco,
author of a popular how-to manual on effective e-mail, argued in an
interview that exclamation points could help convey intonation,
thereby avoiding confusion in some e-mail.
"If you want to indicate stronger emphasis, use all capital
letters and toss in some extra exclamation points," Ms. Sherwood
advises in her guide, available at www.webfoot.com, where she offers
a vivid example:
">Should I boost the power on the thrombo?
"NO!!!! If you turn it up to eleven, you'll overheat the motors,
and IT MIGHT EXPLODE!!"
Dr. Hogan, who founded his online Business Writing Center a
decade ago after years of teaching composition at Illinois State
University here, says that the use of multiple exclamation points
and other nonstandard punctuation like the :-) symbol, are fine for
personal e-mail but that companies have erred by allowing
experimental writing devices to flood into business writing.
He scrolled through his computer, calling up examples of
incoherent correspondence sent to him by prospective students.
"E-mails - that are received from Jim and I are not either
getting open or not being responded to," the purchasing manager at a
construction company in Virginia wrote in one memorandum that Dr. Hogan called to his
screen. "I wanted to let everyone know that when Jim and I are
sending out e-mails (example- who is to be picking up parcels) I am
wanting for who ever the e-mail goes to to respond back to the
e-mail. Its important that Jim and I knows that the person,
intended, had read the e-mail. This gives an acknowledgment that the
task is being completed. I am asking for a simple little 2 sec. Note
that says "ok", "I got it", or Alright."
The construction company's human resources director forwarded the
memorandum to Dr. Hogan while enrolling the purchasing manager in a
writing course.
"E-mail has just erupted like a weed, and instead of considering
what to say when they write, people now just let thoughts drool out
onto the screen," Dr. Hogan said. "It has companies at their wits'
end."